The need for consistency drives our behavior and willingness to commit

 
Chapter 3 of Influence by Robert B. Cialdini looks at our need for commitment and consistency.

Most people have a strong need to be perceived as consistent in their attitudes, behavior, beliefs, etc. According to psychologists, this need is reinforced because 1) society values a high degree of personal consistency, 2) consistent behavior is generally beneficial in daily life by providing a convenient shortcut in dealing with complex issues.

Inconsistent people are unpredictable and often frightening – you never know what they’re going to do. Most of us don’t want to be perceived that way. We want to be liked and accepted, so we conform our behavior to our peers. If you ever want to see this principle in action, behave in a way that’s inconsistent for the group you’re with and watch the response.

Coming from an artistic background, I may be a little closer to the eccentric end of the spectrum than many people and I really enjoy throwing out a curve ball occasionally, just to see what happens – wicked, I know, but so much fun!

I also wonder how a strong adherence to consistency works with the concept of learning from one’s mistakes. The need for consistency would lead us to conclude that, unless an action has strong negative consequences, we will continue to do the wrong thing just because it’s what we’ve always done.

This behavior is reinforced by the second reason as well. If it’s an easy solution to a complex problem, we’ll probably continue doing it, even if it isn’t the best solution.

I’d like to think that we grow and learn from our experiences, but my hopes aren’t high, given the social and personal pressure exerted on us to be consistent.

Where this fits into the marketing scheme of things – if you haven’t guessed already – is that once a small initial commitment has been obtained from someone, it is much easier to keep them moving forward towards the ends you want to achieve. As long as your requests reinforce their need for consistent behavior, most people willingly agree to them.

This is true whether you’re marketing a product or service, questioning a witness or presenting an argument to a jury.

Reciprocation is a fundamental principle of successful marketing

 
One of the most fundamental concepts in human relationships is reciprocation, which is essentially, one person repaying what someone else has given them.

It is the basis of every human interaction: you like me and I like you, I give you three shirts and you give me a goat, you give me a hamburger today and I will gladly pay you Tuesday. It’s also based on a high level of trust and the assumption that everyone in society will play by the same rules.

There are three reasons reciprocation can be exploited, causing us to do things we otherwise might not.

• ● First, because it’s integral to successful cooperation within a group, it is very powerful and can override other factors which might otherwise dictate that we not comply with a request.
• ● Second, if someone does a favor for us first, even someone we don’t like or trust, it puts us in a position of obligation which may result in our complying with a future request from that person.
• ● Third, it can result in an unequal exchange where, to relieve our feelings of obligation, we may agree to grant a request that is much larger or more demanding of us than the original favor.

In scheduling group presentations and training, one of the most common requests I receive is “bring food.” This simple request has always fascinated me because it shows just how deeply the principle of reciprocation is embedded in our collective psyche and how long we’ve been practicing it.

My guess is that it goes back to the dawn of time when small bands of humans, encountering each other, would either fight, flee, or share their possessions, principally food. Eating together could be one of the most powerful social bonding experiences we have.

What this means, in modern terms, is that a group has made a request of me: Bring food. By doing so, they get what they want: food. And I get what I want: an appreciative, receptive audience for the presentation. Imagine how many deals are closed after a good meal.

It also makes me wonder about golf. Spending half a day in the hot sun, chasing a little white ball with three other people must be a tremendously strong bonding experience, especially if everyone plays badly! After that, drinks or a meal in the club house are icing on the cake to close the deal.

The principle of reciprocation – when not misused – makes it possible for us to create relationships with prospects and clients that produce benefits for all involved.

Fixed action patterns are the shortcuts we take to make decisions

 
Behavioral patterns govern most of our activities.

These shortcuts make life easier, which is why we acquired them in the first place. If we had to analyze every aspect of every situation, our species would have died out long ago. So, they allow us to quickly and accurately evaluate, analyze, and make decisions based on past experience.

These choices are usually right – or the patterns that trigger them would have disappeared from society. However, they also have the potential to cause problems for us, especially if we’re not aware of them.

In Influence, Mr. Cialdini relates the story of a jewelry store owner in New Mexico. She had an inventory of turquoise jewelry that had not sold well during the tourist season. Before leaving on a trip, she left a note for her assistant to mark the jewelry half off. When she returned, she wasn’t surprised to learn that all the jewelry had been sold. What did surprise her was the fact that her assistant had doubled the price instead of halving it.

This fixed action pattern is based on the idea of “you get what you pay for.” In a situation where the tourists were unfamiliar with how to evaluate turquoise, they went with the conditioned pattern of expensive equals good.

It’s easy to see how fixed action patterns are both a blessing and a curse. The store owner benefited from selling the jewelry with a much higher margin, but at the same time, the tourists paid more for it than they should have.

Confronted with someone who knows how to make these triggers work to their advantage, we’re all susceptible.

I’m equal parts disturbed and excited by this concept. As a writer and marketer, I delight in crafting communications that say exactly what I want and – hopefully – motivate people to act in the way I want.

At that same time, it’s a little creepy that we can be so susceptible to manipulation. It can happen to us and we won’t even know it, unless we’re on our guard and aware of these fixed action patterns.

Why people respond the way they do

 
I’m re-reading Influence Science and Practice by Robert B. Cialdini. The first time through was enlightening to say the least – and I’ve been in marketing and advertising for 30 years. It was also a little disturbing to read how much power others can have over us, not to mention the power we can wield over them…

So, if you’ve ever wondered why you respond positively or negatively to a request, or why others do, this book is a must read.

Cialdini combines research with practical personal experiences to illuminate the basic types of compliance – reciprocation, consistency, social proof, liking, authority, and scarcity – and how “…their enormous force can be commissioned by a compliance professional who deftly incorporates them into requests…”

Great trial attorneys and negotiators in all areas of business know these techniques, perhaps intuitively. It’s really an extraordinary talent and amazing to watch someone who does it well, as long as you’re not the intended victim.

Unfortunately, we often are and if you find that’s the case, there’s plenty you can do to turn the tables. I’m reading it again to refresh my memory. And because I believe it should be in everyone’s library, there will be much more to come…